Hanes My Way

Many moons ago, I realized that not only are white men's undershirts hot as shit when men wear them, they are hot as shit when WOMEN wear them. But finding the perfectly fitting, snug-but-not-too-tight, not-too-thin (and therefore see-through), not too stretchy-outty white men's t-shirt can put a girl in quite a pickle.

Friends, look no further.

Hanes V-Neck Premium Comfort Soft white t-shirts are the MFing HOLY GRAIL of white t-shirts. Soft. Snug. Well-fitting in the female shoulders, which by nature are, of course, much daintier and delicate than the big strong men usually purchasing things. It's as if these things were made for women, and accidentally marketed for men. Pair them with a cute summery skirt and you'll charm the pants off male babes with your casual "I didn't try too hard and still I'm smoking hot as fuck" look.

Furthermore, I guarantee you wear a size small in these babies (unless you're into over-sized t-shirts, which I am not, and which you shouldn't be, either). Just buying a fresh pack of three (only ten bucks) Target today made me feel like an itsy bitsy little baby girl, the slimmest in the land.

Quick Q.

Maybe its the kilograms of salt I eat everyday, maybe it is my ability to replace water with soda- whatever the reason, my adorable face is not so adorable in the morning.




Why? Because it is swollen, puffy and beyond recognition.




Usually, I try not to fix the marshmallow on top of my neck and just wait for it to deflate by lunchtime.

But, Time, she is up.

This morning I attempted to treat my face as one would treat a sprained ankle:




RICE. Rest. Ice. Compress. Elevate.



Well, I didn't really elevate my face, but I did lie down on the couch and pressed ziploc bags of ice on my face.



So here is my Q: Does anyone know how to depuff a morning face? In a timely fashion?

Thanks,

Kiks

So I haven't posted in awhile. Because I have been been so busy. Sike! I have been chillaxing per usual! Regardless, there is some really dope stuff I just have to blog about.

Bread Pudding.

"Ooey Gooey" Chocolate Chip Bread Pudding to be exact. This artery clogging, carb laden treat is perfection in an 8 x 8 pan. Guests will be amazed at the "Artie's" dessert menu taste and melted chocolatey presentation- and surprised when you tell them how easy it is to make! Hopefully, the rich decadence of the pudding won't give them the 'rhea like Artie's desserts.

Here is the recipe:

2 large eggs at room temperature
2 1/4 cups whole milk (I mixed whole, 2% and cream to make 2 &1/4 cup)
1/2 cup sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon
5 cups cubed or torn stale white bread (I used a stale french baguette)
1 1/2 cups mini chocolate chips

Heat the oven to 350°. In a large bowl, thoroughly mix together the eggs, milk, sugar, and cinnamon. Add the bread and stir gently until all of it is fully covered with the egg mixture. Fold in the chocolate chips. Pour the mixture into a lightly greased 8- by 8-inch casserole dish. Bake for 45 minutes or until a knife comes out clean and the pudding is lightly browned and puffed up on the edges.

To add a little panache- I served it with freshly whipped cream.

Apes and Androids.

Their album "Blood Moon" is pretty tight. Electronic, rock, pop perfection. To start off, one should listen to "Nights of the Week". "Radio" is great. Listening to the album makes me want to put on a cute-ass outfit, drink some light beer, and dance the night away.

http://apesandandroids.com/

Baby Powder.

I wish I knew about the multiple uses of this sweet smelling powder in college. I would have saved myself from ugly hair, smokey smelling clothes, and un-presentable days.

I live by the "only wash your hair every other day" motto. This means my hair is sometimes slick with a day 2 sheen. Enter baby powder. Just throw a handful on your scalp and let the powder get to work. Before you know it your hair will look as fresh as day 1 and NOT GREASY. Seriously, I should have been doing this in high school- when a good day was throwing on sweats and a colorful kerchief to cover my oily rat's nest of a scalp. Also, it miraculously blends well with my mousy brown hair.

Note: Blonde hair is still the easiest color to work with when you feel like powdering the wig.

You can also sprinkle BP on smokey clothes for a quick fix before a night on the town. This function also works when you apply it to the whole body. Basically, BP is never a bad idea before going out- whether it is hair, clothes, or bod.

Okay, I am off to bed- but plz plz plz at least listen to "Nights of the Week" and eat bread pudding. I understand if you don't want to powder your wig. The Apes and Androids stuff is really great and accessible. It isn't at all like the Cocteau Twins which I usually shove down my friends' throats.

A real bad case of Scrabs.

After years of flirting and the occasional half-hearted hook-up, I am finally fucking the shit out of this game.

Our relationship began when I was a kid and forced to play with various older and smarter family members, and then went on through college, when I'd play with my genius--seriously, he really is a genius--friend Miles, who scored over 300 ever fucking time.

The hot and heavy stuff started only this last week, after I started a Facebook account for the sole purpose of playing Scrabulous, Facebook's online version of Scrabble.

First of all, I started this account with much kicking and screaming. "I already have MySpace," I told a friend, the one who was pushing for me to join Facebook just to play him in this game. "Fuck no," I said.

But then...I joined.

And I looked up like 9 million old friends that aren't on MySpace and creepily checked out all their current photos and profile information and all that sort of stalkerish stuff the internet so awesomely allows.

Only 15 of those 9 million are now my actual Facebook friends. But moving on.

The point is Scrabulous. You can play like 10 games at once. You can get online at the same time as your opponent and just fucking go, or you can take your sweet time and sign on whenever you want. You can use the internet to look up 2-letter words nobody really knows the meaning of.

It's fabulous. Ha! It is so fantabulous (HA!!!) it prompts me to make stupid fucking jokes that only I laugh at! It is so scrabtastical that I am not only posting this blog right this very minute, but also clicking over to a different window just to see if any of my opponents have made a move yet! On a Friday night! All alone.

But this is what this game is good for. People who take shame in their weekend night reclusiveness and seek distraction from it. People who have a lot of work to do but don't want to do any of it. Also, there is a built-in instant messager thing that allows you to put down your opponent as often as you like and without the fear of bodily harm that real-life Scrabble-dissing might warrant. I prefer the old, "I'll kill you," or, if they're going too slow, "Zzzzzz."

I'm all in a tizzy, just typing about it! I'm going to go click "refresh" once or twice or maybe more.

Snow!

It snowed today in Pittsburgh, and I wore one damn cute hodgepodge of a winter outfit. This made me consider winter essentials. What are winter essentials? Where can one find them? How should one go about properly layering such essentials?

Seriously, answer me.

I'm kidding. I'll do the answering here.

Crucial Winter Stuff:

1) Gloves, people. This is crucial if you walk to campus like I do and, say, sometimes talk on your cell phone as you walk, or else stick your hands in a not-as-warm-as-you-would-like coat, and find your poor little paws still chilly. Today, I bought a perfectly toasty pair of gloves at Rite Aid for $9.99. They're bright blue.

2) Hats! Who doesn't love a cute and ridiculously warm winter hat? You can go old-timey, kids-from-A Christmas Story-style (see below), or get a nice wooly beanie. I prefer a red wool hat with a fleece lining that my sister got in Norway. It's so awesome and original, I couldn't find a picture of it anywhere on the internet.

3) A cute coat. This is crucial. You don't want to freeze your titties off. Wool is the best way to go, in my opinion, and preferably with some sort of toasty lining. I got a new black one from Target. Sixty bones. Not the warmest EVER (not a toasty lining, but a silk one, and the wool is some sort of blend, which isn't as warm as I initially hoped). But it is much better than H&M's version, which I wore all last year and now regret. H&M coats are basically a bunch of threadbare cotton strung together with buttons. What a waste.

4) Waterproof boots. Here in P-burgh, it rains. A lot. Biblical type raining. It also snows, as aforementioned. I prefer my Target brand (here I go again--but Target has some really great apparel) rain boots. I have a pair in both black and army green. They make me want to go for a jaunt across some wild England moor. Also, they are wicked cheap.

5) Long underwear. I LIVE in my long underwear whilst lounging in my apartment. Truly can't recommend it enough--comfortable, durable, and warm as shit. I own a North Face brand but I am sure any thermalware will do.

I'd like to include more fun pictures to supplement my crucial winter elements, but, frankly, am too lazy. Also, mid-way through writing this blog I went out and had three beers, and now I'm both lazy and tipsy and tired to boot.

Fall, Chillin', etc.

Dear HMPV readers,

Look you don't even have to say it. I know what is on everyone's minds. Where the hell has the ol' kikster been? Well, my friends, I can tell you one thing- I have not been doing what I do best- chilling. Instead, I have been super busy. Sigh. That said, I needed to take a despy time out and chill aka blog about a few things.

Fall is finally here. Huzzah. I have been celebrating fall with tons of cute new outfits and wearing my hair down. Here are a couple of fun fall items:

Old Navy Toggle Hoodie. So I am a total copy-cat. I went up to visit Smash this fall and she was rocking this adorable little number. It is the perfect combination of a sweatshirt hoodie and a jacket. It also helps me accomplish the Joey Potter girl-next-door look that I sometimes attempt to emulate. Also, it is only 35 dollars!

My working girl woe? Dry hands. My hands are so red and chapped from excessive hand washing/sanitizing that when I showed them to my mom- she lost a night's sleep worrying about my skin. True story!Enter Eucerin. Don't be swayed by the ugly utilitarian container. This stuff is amazing. Within days of slathering its creamy goodness on my hands, the redness was gone and my skin returned to its girly softness.

Another essential element to fall wardrobes are boots. And lots of them. I love slouchy suede boots. They aren't overly warm like UGGs. They also tend to look good on calves and ankles of all sizes. Trust me, a sturdy leather boot and a wicked muscular calf- Not a good combo. Slouch is the best. These boots are from Steve Madden and only a hundred bucks! I wear them with tights, leggings, and skinny jeans!

The new Sigur Ros CD/DVD. Nothing suits a dreamy fall day more than beautifully orchestrated music with undecipherable lyrics. The new Sigur Ros provides that and more. The "Heima" DVD is a documentary that follows the band performing all over Iceland. The cinematography alone will put you in a good mood. Sometimes, when I watch the trailer, my eyes tear up. Because it is so beautiful.

More tidbits to come!

Love,

Kiks

Toot toot!

All aboard at Procrastination Station!


Every now and then, whether in emails to friends or in my MySpace blog (once alive, now dead) I like to list my latest methods of procrastinating. It's fun. Also, it's just one more way of procrastinating. (Hannah, your lizard post inspired this list format--it's easy and fast. Funny and smart. I'm smitten.)

1) Eating. This is a recurring theme in many blogs here at But Hey...Pura Vida, perhaps because eating good food is so essential to living the pura vida. When procrastinating, I like to make fun snacks that remind me of my childhood. Like peanut butter smeared on celery sticks. Yum! Or, brownies.

2) Drinking. My first preference is alcohol, but if it's before 4pm I recommend Starbucks nonfat lattes. Low cal. Smooth flavor. Caffeinated. All around delicious.

3) Watching Flight of the Conchords videos via YouTube.

4) Lurking around on the MySpace pages of friends, family, musicians, strangers, celebrities, and hot dudes alike.

5) Online shopping. There's nothing quite like virtually shopping with some virtual money.

6) Real shopping. But only if you've just been paid. And actually, I don't highly recommend this one because when you use it too often as a form of procrastinating, you find yourself stuck with #5, which isn't that great of a suggestion on my part anyway. #5 is actually really depressing, when you think about it. Because that's what happens when you're fucking poor. You get depressed about it. Because as everyone knows, money equals true happiness.

7) Ogling/dissing celebrities.

8) Decorating. While procrastinating this last month, I have repainted our dining room (adorable and chipper pale pale pink), our dining room table (black), and our living room (light green with one darker green wall). This is an incredibly productive way of procrastinating and requires a keen eye (if I may say), a roommate's indifference, and loads of caffeine-induced energy.

9) More YouTubing. I've discovered a love for the new musical Spring Awakening, and rediscovered my love for Les Miserables, and also watched inane clips of things I shouldn't care about, like that model who fell through a runway floor, Britney's VMA letdown, and Beyonce EATING it (head over heels, face to the floor) during some performance.

10) Craigslist. But let me warn you: If you find something you want to purchase/take via Craigslist, jump on that thing like a ravenous motherfreaking wildebeest. You have to move at cheetah speed. It took me a month to find a couch only because within, like, 30 seconds of a Craigslist posting, some Olympian track star or someone already managed to get to the location of said sofa, pay for it, and haul it away. But also, the Missed Connection section is an endless guilty pleasure. I love reading stuff like, "To the blue-eyed beauty at the bus stop on Monday. We made eye contact twice. Up for more?"

May your procrastination endeavors be fruitful. Go forth! Godspeed!

Lizards: Pura Vida of Nicaraguan Living

Reasons Why I Heart Lizards:

1. Adorable. Undeniably.
2. They devour bugs that sting, i.e. mosquitoes.
3. They just chill.
4. No animosity towards me (unlike Scary Wasp).
5. The noise they make is cool.
6. They can squeeze through walls.
7. They let me take pictures of them.
8. Fun to draw.
9. I have no friends.

Friday Night Lights.

I am so hooked. Has everyone seen this show? It almost got cancelled this year, but luckily some NBC bigwig saved it because it is amazing.

When I wasn't working this weekend, I was curled up on the couch watching this show on DVD.

I felt it was really important to let you all know about FNL so that you all will also check it out, watch it, and make sure it doesn't ever get cancelled!

OK- let's get down to business. You may be asking- kiks- why do you think this show is amazing? You also like One Tree Hill. Why should we trust you?

My answer to this is as follows:

So I may like the occasional soapy WB teen show (read: DC, OTH, GG) but this doesn't prevent me from watching universally awesome shows like Six Feet Under, Veronica Mars, and Dexter. In order to recognize quality TV, you must first have something to compare it to- ergo, I check out tons of shows.

Getting back to the important stuff . . . FNL is tight. Really tight. Here is why.

1. The show is not about football. It is a drama about the everyday lives in small town Texas. So girls, don't worry about the occasional football scene. With all the romantic sub-plots and family struggles to watch, you will not be worried about what is going on with Dillon Panther Football.
2. The plethora of hot guys. This show has more hotties on it than any other television show I have ever seen. No joke.

Zach Gilford. It is hard not to immediately fall in love with the awkward secondstring quarterback, Matt Saracen. He takes care of his dementia-ridden grandma while working at a local ice cream shop to make ends meet and on top of all of that, he is thrust into the spotlight as the new QB after the first episode! He also has the sweetest love story of the whole show with . . the coach's daughter! Effing adorable.

Tim Riggins. Ok, first of all his name- it is a sexy football player name. It goes perfectly with his brooding, self destructive personality. For all you VM fans out there, I think I can safely say that he is the "Logan Echolls" of this show, but I don't want to pigeonhole him. I don't really think I need to tell you too much about his character because really- look at his picture. Then watch the show and constantly change your opinion of him. Why? Because he is so complex.

Gaius Charles plays "Smash" Williams. In addition to being the star running back on the Panthers, Smash talks about himself in third person and has tons of personal turmoil. He also has an adorable love interest on the show. He is cute and I love his name- Gaius.

Kyle Chandler. I love him. He plays the inspirational Coach Taylor. Besides having the perfect southern drawl, Kyle Chandler is an amazing actor. The on-screen dynamic between Chandler and Connie Britton, who plays his wife, is incredible. Not to mention that the scenes between Coach Taylor and the players bring me to tears. Total DILF.

Anyways, there are actually more adorable boys on the show I could blog about, but I have to get to other blog-worthy things about FNL.

3. The cinemaotography/ direction/ music choices for the show.

The other awesome thing about FNL is the way it is filmed. After memorizing their lines, the actors shoot the scene. The thing is- the directors shoot the scenes with steady cam and the actors have no idea where the cameras are while they are filming. So even though it is scripted, the show presents itself as a documentary.The music choices for the show are also great. First of all, the opening credits song is by a band called "Explosions in the Sky". When I heard the name of the band, I was immediately repulsed. It sounds like some alterna-Christian band. Good thing I effing love the song in the credits. The instrumental rock song's crescendo parallels the build up of angst for all the characters. The show also uses Iron & Wine, Ryan Adams, and Spoon.

4. The show is about football. Yes, this is also a reason to watch the show. You can't help but root for the Dillon Panthers after watching their hot Coach give inspirational speeches and act as a father figure for all the messed-up, cute high school boys.

The second season premiere is on Friday, October 5th. I am DVR-ing it. All day on Friday, Bravo is playing season 1 beginning at 8AM. Check that shizzy out. You won't regret it.