GIRL: Let's run away together!
BOY: Oh! How nice that would be! But wherever would we go?
GIRL: Oh, I don't know! Somewhere large, urban, urbane, a place where they can't stop us from, from...
BOY: From holding hands and riding together!
GIRL: Yes! Oh, how nice it would be to just be somewhere big, where things were happening where the future was growing. Like Buffalo or Grand Rapids!
BOY: How wonderful it would be! To finally just be young and alive! To just be with you, dear!
GIRL: *Titters*
BOY: What is it?
GIRL: You called me "dear"! You've never done that before-
BOY: Oh, I apologize, truly. I didn't mean to be so presumptio-
GIRL: No. No. I liked it. It felt nice.
BOY: *Titters*
GIRL: *Blushes*
BOY: Oh, but how will we get to one of these places? How can we escape so quickly, like the night through a sieve or a thief through the wickets and high grass?
GIRL: Why, we'll take your father's yacht, of course!
BOY: *Blushes*
GIRL: What, what is it?
BOY: Oh, phoo! I'm afraid I can't really sail, this is just a silly outfit!
GIRL: Phoo!
BOY: Oh, how embarrassing this is! To think of me, parading like some captain when the first time I wore this hat I had to be reminded which end was front! I wish someone would just invent an autocar! How much easier running away will be then!
GIRL: Oh! Well, we can't go far together. Then let's just get lost! Somewhere nearby but not too far, just long enough to hold hands and titter and blush! Please, please! I promise I'll let you call me dear and perhaps I'll even take my coat off for a spell!
BOY: Oh, how nice it will be!
LITTLE BROTHER THE CORNPICKER: Hey!
GIRL: GASP!
LITTLE BROTHER THE CORNPICKER: You two aren't going nowheres!
GIRL: I thought your little brother the cornpicker was to be picking till nightfall!
BOY: Why, I thought, oh, I knew, oh-
LITTLE BROTHER THE CORNPICKER: I already met my quota for the day, riffraff! I was allowed to leave the cornfields! But I'll be goddamned if I let you two fanny about town sullying my good family name!
BOY: Oh little brother but to love, to be in love, it's like nothing I've ever-
LITTLE BROTHER THE CORNPICKER: Don't tell me about no love!
BOY: Phoo!
GIRL: Phoo!
*LITTLE BROTHER THE CORNPICKER takes bite of raw corn and undoes one strap of overalls*
FIN.
3 comments:
Hilarious. I wish Little Brother Cornpicker was my lil' bro! Amazing post as usual!
don't you just hate when your little physical laboring blue collar brother tries to spoil your dreams?
i want to know how your got that photo of Little Brother Cornpicker. did you just google his first and last name?
HAHAHAHAHA taking a bite of raw corn. BAHAHA
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